Almost 2 years ago I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd child. I was estatic! The whole family was. My first born was an active 7 year old with a mind that is hard to keep up with. The pregnancy that followed was disheartening.
I worked in a medical facility and was exposed to every germ and bug out there. Being pregnant I also caught every germ and bug out there. I was always sick, my allergies were uncontrolled by what medication I could take, and I was not allowed any migraine medication at all. (I was one of those lucky ladies whose migraines got worse while pregnant.) My family suffered.
Most nights I was unable to cook dinner either because I was sick or laying in bed with a migraine. My husband works 12 hour days and most of the time my poor son was stuck with a mom who was stuck in bed. I felt horrible. The words "It will be better after the baby is born" came out of my mouth so many times that I wish I had a dollar for each of them.
At 8 months I quit my job because I was hardly there with my chronic migraines and I had already been out for a month with pneumonia. The baby came a week late, go figure, and finally I could go back on allergy and migraine medicine. Things would be better. Or so I thought.
The next year was not much better. Yes, I am doing better, but now the words "I wish we could do that but your brother is sick" keep popping out of my mouth. Several ear infections, asthma, GERD, bronchitis, pneumonia and uncounted colds later the baby ended up in the hospital after 9 days of vomiting. We do not have all the answers yet, but we do know that there is a couple known defficiencies with his immune system and he is not making antibodies to all of his immunizations.
The realization then came to me that I cannot be the mom that I want to be in the current situation we are in. I cannot control all of my youngest sons chronic sicknesses, but there are things I can control. So, now I am a mother on a mission. A mom with a hectic life, although I only currently have 2 children. A mom that sometimes ends the day in mismatched socks... This is my story and this blog are the future chapters as I take back the ability to be that mom I always wanted to be.
~Cassie~
